A Metaphor For Depression

On rainy days 

All I want is to see clearly 

Water droplets cling to my window screen

I can only make out 

vague figures running across the street 

And outlines of branches 

reaching towards the heavens

Offering themselves to something 

I cannot see

Sometimes even on sunny days

The rain stays 

I look outwards 

trying to piece together objects that should be familiar to me

When I feel like this 

people tell me

I’m not acting like myself

Their certainty in this conviction 

assures me

they know me better 

than i could ever know myself

I want to ask them

How they are so sure

This is not me

Have they spent 

Hours after dusk 

cloaked in my thoughts? 

Bathing in numbness? 

Searching for answers

in the folds of my memories?

Have they considered that this is also me

A body floating away from a spirit 

Someone who tries to shake the rain 

from the crevices of the window screen 

Only to end up 

awaiting the sun’s rise   

So she may see clearly again

from my previous blog posted on 07.22.21